Thursday, February 3, 2011

Tough days and Signs

Dear Simon,

Hi baby boy. The last week has been very busy and very draining. I went to my first Face2Face group on Friday. It was Jamie's group in St. Louis. I met some AMAZING Angel Moms there and we had a really nice time. (We even got kicked out of the Bread Co.!) Saturday was Ms. A's baby shower. It was such a hard day for mommy. I am so happy for her, but I am so sad that I never got to have my shower to celebrate you. And I kept thinking about how you should have been there, 5 and a half months old, being passed around the room to family and friends with baby fever. Instead, I felt awkward and sad. I didn't want Ms. A to be worrying about me (which of course she did) and I felt like I had to fake being cheerful. Overall, going was not my best idea. Since then, I have been very down, missing you. We had a big storm this week, and I hate when it snows and ices. I worry about your place at the cemetery and I don't like not being able to go see you there. I got you lots of nice things for Valentine's Day and St. Patrick's Day. I am excited to bring them to you. I was looking through all your pictures today. You are such a beautiful and brave little man. I never knew I could have so much love in me.
Thank you so much for the sign you brought Grandma today. I think she has been having a tough week. You are so sweet to bring her closer to you.
I love you with all my heart. You are the best thing Daddy and I have ever done.
Love,
Mommy

PS- Can you please watch over the people I am praying extra for today? They could really use an angel with them.

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